The Slice: Checking in with “Spokane man”

It has been a while since we last checked in with “Spokane man,” to see what he has been up to that made the news.

As always, the way to find out is to search the S-R’s electronic archives for appearances of “Spokane man” in articles and headlines.

Well, he “was arrested on suspicion of driving under the influence of alcohol.”

A trumped up charge, no doubt.

Then, on another day, we read you know who has a 20-year criminal history and “was sentenced to life in prison.”

Wonder how he’ll wiggle out of that.

In another article “Spokane man” was sentenced for a “longstanding scheme.”

You don’t want to know.

But it was not all bad news for our boy.

Alert S-R readers would have noted in a headline that he “learns about his heritage on a reality TV show.”

Well, that’s certainly where I’d go to learn about mine.

Still, “Spokane man” can’t seem to stay out of trouble for long.

Newspaper readers learned that he “had been accused of shooting another man in the buttocks.”

A misunderstanding, no doubt.

Then there was the news that he “faces a murder charge” and a report that he “was shot in the leg at least once and possibly stabbed.”

Say what you will, the guy’s a gamer.

But what about “Spokane woman”?

She was arrested “after she allegedly fired a handgun in the air on the front steps of her home.”

Good grief. Can’t you even salute our rough-and-tumble Western heritage without the man coming down on you like a ton of bricks?

In an unrelated incident, “Spokane woman” was “accused of ramming a police car with a stolen truck.”

The story didn’t say, but I suspect the cop stole a parking spot for which she had been patiently waiting.

How about “Coeur d’Alene man”? What’s he been up to?

Well, “He was arrested early Tuesday for allegedly shooting into a subdivision on the city’s northwest end.”

Admittedly, there are better ways to protest sprawl.

And “Coeur d’Alene woman”?

She “was arrested on drug charges Saturday morning after a sheriff’s deputy found her asleep in a Jeep at the scene of a gasoline theft from a public vehicle in Hayden.”

Well, at least she didn’t try to flee the scene. So there’s that.

Until next time.

Today’s Slice question: Who believed in you when it really mattered?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. Over the course of your lifetime, how much gravy do you think you have consumed?