Miss Manners: Host child’s party at free venue

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am the godmother of a lovely girl who will be turning 2. Her mother and I have decided that we want to throw her a nice casual party at a fall festival that includes hay rides, party favors, live music, a decorated gazebo, etc., for a reasonable price that I am happy to cover.

The cost of the party reservation does not include the cost of the entrance fee into the festival, which is $15 per person. Is it the responsibility of the hosts (my friend and me) to front the ticket cost for our guests? Or is it reasonable to ask the guests to take on this payment? I am a single 20-something young woman with limited income and my friend is a single parent. We are just not sure how to go about this with fairness and grace.

GENTLE READER: If the party reservation does not include the entrance fee to any of the festival’s enticements, Miss Manners is not surprised that the price is so reasonable. Unfortunately, fairness and grace will not be forefront on your guests’ minds if they are invited to a party for which they have to pay (and pay not insignificantly, since presumably no 2-year-old is traveling without parents).

As compromised as you and your friend’s financial situations may be, you are making the assumption that your guests’ are expendable.

No party invitation should come with an entrance fee (a lesson lost on most adults celebrating birthdays at restaurants by “inviting” guests to pay for their own meals). Miss Manners is afraid that you must find an alternate venue – perhaps someone’s backyard where you could create a similarly festive atmosphere? At 2 years old, the birthday girl and her friends will have just as good of a time – and their parents will have an even better one for not being charged for the fun.