She’ll accept only female physicians

Dear Annie: I’m 22 years old and recently needed an operation in the only hospital in our area. I am an extremely shy and modest female and would never go to a male doctor except in an emergency. Luckily, I was able to arrange for a female surgeon and an all-female surgery team.

However, while I was in the recovery room, a young male nurse – a guy with whom I had gone to high school – came into the room and told me he was there to remove my catheter. I was stunned. I told him there was no way I would allow him to do that. He tried to convince me, saying, “I’m a nurse. It’s OK,” but I wouldn’t back down. He finally found a female nurse after I threatened to sue him if he came any closer.

Am I wrong to feel that a young male my age, especially someone I know, should not have access to the most intimate and private parts of my body, especially since removing a catheter is not an emergency?

I made a pact with my boyfriend that no male will see me undressed until I marry, and then only my husband.

The idea that this nurse believes he has the right to violate me in such a way is keeping me from going back in for a follow-up operation. Do I have the right to forbid a male nurse from attending me? I was told that since female nurses can examine male patients, a male nurse should be able to do the same with females. The anxiety is killing me just thinking about it. What should I do? – Modest in Iowa

Dear Modest: Most health professionals have no prurient interest in their patients. A nurse, male or female, who removes a catheter is acting solely in a medical capacity. He was not “violating” you. However, you are entitled to request only female nurses if the hospital can provide them. Please don’t let your anxiety keep you from follow-up treatment. Talk to your doctor about your concerns.