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The Slice: Sneak a peek at your own risk

Let’s face it.

If you find yourself home alone and initiate a hard-target search for unwrapped Christmas presents, there’s a good chance you can find them. And if the gifts already have been placed under the tree, there are tactics that can be employed to ascertain the contents.

But is that wise?

Let’s break it down.

Pro: If you find out what you will be receiving, you can secretly savor your presents even before the big day.

Con: If discovered, your efforts to find out what you will be getting could wind up hurting the feelings of a beloved Christmas traditionalist.

Pro: If your gifts are a disappointment, you can start rehearsing your “spontaneous” Christmas morning reaction. “Ear muffs? For me! Allllllriiiiiiight! I’m the luckiest person in Spokane.”

Con: If you are a lousy actor, you might not fool anyone.

Pro: If you find out ahead of time and are pleased, you might float around in a good mood for days instead of being your usual self.

Con: You might be mistaken about which gifts in the back of the closet are for what person.

Pro: If your gift appears to be ruinously expensive, you might still have time to drop hints about the need to reduce spending this Christmas. And maybe the purchaser can take it back and get you something more modest.

Con: See above.

Pro: Finding out in advance what you will be receiving gives you some notion of how you will fare in the Christmas morning arms race known as comparing presents. If it appears that you are about to be blown out of the water, you still have time to beef up your offerings.

Con: It’s not always easy to tell if a hard-to-hide bulky gift is actually your “big” present. For all you know, your No. 1 present will turn out to be a gift certificate or concert tickets.

Pro: Finding out ahead of time allows you to prepare some thank-you material along the lines of “Let me tell you exactly why I needed this …”

Con: You might find yourself having to lie. “No, I haven’t been trying to locate the stash. I’m insulted that you would even suggest that.”

TODAY’S SLICE QUESTION: How many people hold wrapped gifts to their foreheads and guess, Carnac-style?

Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. One great thing about family-photo Christmas cards is that people often include their dogs.

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