The Slice: You may not want to gobble up these birds

Need help preparing a Thanksgiving dinner?

Whether you are an experienced cook or a first-time holiday host, sometimes it’s nice to have a little advice.

So the second-graders at South Pines Elementary School in Spokane Valley are ready to assist.

Several of the kids said the first step is to purchase a turkey at a store. Fair enough.

But how big is best?

A youngster named Alexus recommended “40 pounds.”

That’s a good-sized bird. Unless there will be a couple dozen people coming to your place on Thursday, that should leave plenty for leftovers.

Eschewing the sanitized store-bought approach, a no-nonsense kid named Mason preferred a more hands-on starting point. “Kill the turkey,” he wrote.

If you don’t, everything gets very un-Norman Rockwell-like in a hurry.

Classmate Kylie picks it up from there. “After that you go and gut it.”

Check.

Presumably young Chloe meant the same when she wrote, “Clean the guts.”

Then? “You let it sit in water for about 10 minets,” said Ryan.

After that? “Put stuffing inside,” said Noelle.

If you need more specifics, Isaiah has it covered. “Get some ingredients.”

Who doesn’t love ingredients?

After that, you cook the bird.

“In the oven at thirdy digries,” wrote Emily.

But let’s face it, that could take a while.

For those in a bit of a hurry, classmate Shelby offered an alternative – “70 degrees” for “29 minits.”

Another second-grader specified that the oven should be set at “about 60 to 67.”

Yet another recommended “100 tgrese” for “3 minutes.”

And then there was Ashley, who suggested “3.1” degrees.

Of course, the important thing is that the turkey is done without being too dry.

If you follow the instructions of the South Pines junior chefs, you might want to make sure a phone is handy so someone can call 9-1-1 a few hours after dinner.

But on another turkey matter, there is widespread agreement.

“Goes good with pumkin pie,” said Edward.

Today’s Slice question: How many medical appointments can you have in one 12-month period and still consider it a good year?