The Slice: King County would rather see us all move over to Idaho

There are two kinds of voters in Eastern Washington.

There is the sort that bitterly resents being marginalized by the West Side’s bigger population. And there’s the kind that regards those Seattle area voters as the voice of sanity.

This isn’t about the merits of one side vs. the other.

But now that a week has passed since the election, The Slice wondered what the King County Voter thinks about rendering Spokane area voters all but irrelevant in some statewide races. So what follows is a transcript of my hard-to-believe interview with the former.

The Slice: Do you feel guilty about repeatedly crushing the hopes and dreams of many Eastern Washington residents who cast ballots?

King County Voter: No. It’s your “Love it or leave it” crowd that hates me. So I can’t understand why they don’t take their own advice and move to Idaho.

The Slice: But is it fair that you always get to win?

King County Voter: Fair? You want fair? In politics? Ahahahahahahahaha. Oh, that’s rich. Fair, he says. Look, I’m large and in charge. Get used to it.

The Slice: Well, what do you think of Eastern Washington in general?

King County Voter: Seriously? I don’t think much of anything, I guess. I do root for Gonzaga in the NCAA tournament unless they play U-Dub.

The Slice: What do you suspect Spokane area voters think of you?

King County Voter: Never really thought about that.

The Slice: Would it disappoint you to learn that some believe you are too big for your britches?

King County Voter: “Britches.” Oh, my. I love the way you country folks talk.

The Slice: Well, how would you react to hearing that some over here regard you as a political savior?

King County Voter: That’s nice. And they should remember that their cute little votes count, too. At least, I think they do.

The Slice: Would you support a candidate who came from Eastern Washington?

King County Voter: You mean like if he or she were in recovery and lived over here now?

The Slice: Never mind. Thanks for your time.

King County Voter: Sure. Always happy to help.

Today’s Slice question: Pie or cake?