Night owl tires of early birds’ taunts

Dear Diane: I have a problem. It may seem minor to you and some of your readers, but it has been bothering me for as long as I can remember. Here goes:

I am not a morning person. I know many people who ARE morning people. I have found that many of them have the same attitude toward us “night owls.” They seem to feel that because we choose to sleep until 10 or 11 a.m. that we are lazy and unproductive members of society. We get to be the butt of their jokes and the objects of their disdain.

If I have to hear my early-bird roommates say one more time, “‘Good Morning’ … or should I say, ‘Good Afternoon’? Ha ha ha,” I will scream! I get the same amount of sleep as they do, I simply get it at a different time of day.

Why does the early bird get the worm?

Why can’t the mid-morning bird get one too?

What is up with today’s society that people feel the need to ostracize those of us with different internal clocks?

— Well-rested in Washington

Dear Washington: I feel your pain. I, too, am a night owl, and cannot bear the smug comments of Morning People.

I don’t understand why people think they’ve accomplished something worthy simply by maintaining Farmer’s Hours. People have different body clocks, and your roommates should recognize and respect that. You aren’t lazy — you just operate under a different circadian rhythm.

Take heart, for while the early bird may get the worm, she’ll get sleepy from stuffing herself, making her easy prey for the well-rested cat (you). So, don’t be afraid to bare your claws and shoot back a few comments of your own toward those annoying roommates of yours.