Safe haven needed for all children
When Gary Staton abandoned nine of his children, the oldest 17, at an Omaha, Neb., hospital last month, a network anchor had a good chuckle: Wasn’t that taking the safe-haven law a little too far? Who was that guy, anyway?
She might be laughing less to learn that eight other families have done the same thing since then, leaving a total of 17 children – only one baby – in Nebraska’s hands. One of those was a 14-year-old girl from Iowa, dropped off last week by her grandmother.
Staton later explained himself: His wife had died a year earlier, soon after the youngest child’s birth. He’d been out of work for months. “I was with her for 17 years, and then she was gone. What was I going to do?” he said on TV. “We raised them together. I didn’t think I could do it alone. I fell apart. I couldn’t take care of them.”
What he did was legal in Nebraska, and should be legal everywhere. As horrifying a step as it is to abandon children, even in a safe place, it just reveals the depths of Staton’s despair.
Modern American society isn’t supposed to get rid of its children like used cars or outdated couches. Yet throwaway kids are raising themselves, and even with a parent, some are living in homeless shelters or under bridges.
Staton’s story could have ended worse. How many times have we read of parents who killed their kids and then themselves because they couldn’t cope and didn’t want to leave the kids alone? How many parents in poor countries make the ultimate sacrifice of sending their children abroad with trusted others in hopes they’ll have a better life?
As this economic downturn drives people from their homes or jobs, many into a free fall, they need help, not punishment or ridicule.
What’s happening in Nebraska ought to be a wake-up call for every state. We’re seeing it there only because that state’s unique safe-haven law, which took effect in July, applies to children of all ages. Other states allow leaving only infants in hospitals without fear of prosecution.
So the grandmother from Iowa could have been prosecuted in Iowa, though as of the last report, she has the child back and will not be.
Alarmed by all the older children being left in Nebraska, its governor and the state senator who introduced the safe-haven bill are proposing it be narrowed. That would be a shame. Other states should instead expand their laws to be like Nebraska’s.
Of course, parents are responsible for taking care of their children. But sometimes the most responsible thing they can do is place them where they’ll be safe. It shouldn’t require a report of child abuse to get a child out of an unstable home.
Extreme and traumatic, the safe-haven provision should be available as a last resort. Caregivers should know they’ll lose control once their kids are in foster care, maybe forever. And human services departments should offer caregivers other alternatives when they are stressed but not necessarily on the verge of harming them. Respite care or “crisis families” could step in while parents get help with child care, jobs, housing or emotional support.
Finally, this again points to the need for more aggressive pregnancy-prevention measures, so people are prepared to care for kids when they have them. While the Statons may not have anticipated their change in circumstances, one wonders about their judgment in having 10 children.
But the bottom line is this: People are being stretched to the breaking point, sometimes by situations outside their control. While we’re bailing out Wall Street, surely we can also lend a hand to desperate families with children.