Roommate not paying fair share

Dear Annie: Last May, my fiance and I rented a three-bedroom house with a basement and a two-car garage, and agreed to let his best friend, “Josh,” move in. We would each pay $500 a month to cover the rent and utilities. So far, Josh has paid only $200. Plus, he keeps his room full of dirty clothes and dishes.

How can I make my fiance understand that I am tired of having the two of us pay all the bills? Josh has been looking for work, but not very hard. Also, Josh has a daughter who lives with her mother, and when their electricity was cut off, she washed her clothes in our home, even though she earns more money than I do. I asked her not to do this without first getting my permission, and she got really angry. She constantly refers to the place as “Josh’s” house, which really burns me up.

I am trying to be reasonable, and I certainly don’t want to have a falling out with my fiance over this, but I am tired of being broke after each payday. Please help. – Wisconsin

Dear Wisconsin: This sounds like the plot of “You, Me and Dupree.” The situation with Josh is not likely to get better, and even if he becomes a more reliable tenant, you will still have to deal with the ex and their daughter. Your living arrangements are not working, and you must find a way to transmit this information to your fiance so he understands how serious an issue it is. If he is unwilling to toss out his best friend, you may be stuck with Josh until your lease is up. But insist that the next place you rent will be just the two of you. Make it about privacy and not about Josh, and your fiance may be more receptive.

Dear Annie: When my daughter was a teenager, she found out the hard way that she could get oral herpes through oral sex. There still is no cure for herpes.

Now my daughter is pregnant with my first grandchild. Herpes is a very serious condition that must be carefully monitored during pregnancy, and if my daughter has an active outbreak at the time of delivery, she will need to have a caesarian to keep the baby safe from infection.

Although the last thing on a teen’s mind is the birth of her future children, it would be a wise girl who learned this lesson in order to avoid heartbreak in her future. Thanks for getting this message out. – Murrieta, Calif.

Dear Murrieta: Many teens mistakenly don’t think oral sex is sex. Listen up, kids. If you are performing oral sex, you are most definitely having sex, and you can contract a sexually transmitted disease. And because oral sex is treated so casually, the self-esteem issues can be severe, particularly for girls. We care about you – please care about yourselves.