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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

The Slice

Paul Turner The Slice

THE SLICE

Hey, kids, here’s a warning from your old pal Uncle Slice.

If you try to partially unwrap Christmas presents to see what you are getting, there’s a chance you will get caught. Fortunately for you, though, the adult world offers plenty of tried-and-true excuses you can borrow.

“It was an unfortunate reaction to a medication I was taking.”

“Mistakes were made.”

“Our accounting firm appears to have been in error.”

“Before I respond, I need to consult with my pastor.”

“I was under a great deal of stress and had been drinking.”

“I would love to address these allegations. But on advice of counsel, I am not at liberty to comment at this time.”

And so on. Of course, you might want to reject adult excuses and simply fall back on a kids-world classic.

“The dog did it.”

Paul Turner

pault@spokesman.com