They’ll be a dynamic duo, or their evil twins

SEATTLE – Can we agree on one thing?

Yes, it would be nice if Adrian Beltre’s home run total was closer to the 48 he hit to hook a $64 million contract out of the Seattle Mariners instead of the 19 he actually hit wearing the uniform.

Sure, it would be a bonus to get a little pop from the bats of good hands people Yuniesky Betancourt, Jose Lopez and Jeremy Reed. Last year, Seattle’s collection of punchless Judys at the shortstop, second and center positions hit all of .249 with 16 homers in nearly 1,800 at bats.

It would be remarkable if the bullpen could faithfully protect a lead without calamity, and amazing if rookie catcher Kenji Johjima’s stats translated literally from the Japanese.

But if the Mariners are going to do any bushwhacking out of their 90-loss hell of the past two seasons, it’s pretty obvious who has to swing the meanest machetes.

Joel Pineiro and Gil Meche.

The Flopsy Twins.

That’s a harsh label for a pair of 27-year-old pitchers who between them have managed to win almost 100 games for Seattle, but if it’s unfair it’s also a fact: No other players have so confounded club management in the freefall back to the bad old days. Their disinclination to leverage their pitching gifts and seize their destinies is one reason a 43-year-old soft tosser is still the ace of the rotation.

And in the process, they’ve been branded – again, a bit unfairly – as symbols of the failure of all those heralded young arms in the M’s farm system.

Remember the Little Unit? Six-foot-10 giant Ryan Anderson never threw a big-league pitch. Bobby Madritsch and Cha Seung Baek? Cut and cut. Clint Nageotte and Travis Blackley? Shuffled off to Tacoma again. Matt Thornton? Shipped to Chicago, another project gone bust.

That old “Refuse to Lose” slogan? It’s been updated for these guys to “Refuse to Produce.”

Meche and Pineiro have produced – but as many gray hairs as great storylines.

The first hint that things might be different in 2006 came Tuesday night, when Pineiro cruised through five innings against the Los Angeles Angels with a 6-0 lead – not dominant as he often was during his best years of 2002 and 2003, but resourceful and tough-minded. When he tired a bit in the sixth, he did have one lapse: After not getting a third-strike call from plate umpire Larry Vanover, Pineiro left a fastball up that Garrett Anderson swatted for a three-run homer.

Nevertheless, the M’s hung on for a 10-8 victory and Pineiro’s first win.

“But it’s only one win,” Pineiro said. “I don’t want to get my hopes up too much.”

Nor should M’s fans. Pineiro and Meche have tantalized them before with good outings followed by comas, good months followed by meltdowns.

They went in reverse order last year – Pineiro looking so awful early that he was sent briefly to Tacoma, but pitching better the second half. Still, he was just 7-11 with a 5.62 earned run average. Meche actually won 10 games, but he was 0-2 with a 6.23 ERA after July 23.

Both have battled some injuries, but mostly they’ve been maddeningly inconsistent. Meche, especially, is said to possess No. 1 starter’s stuff – apparently everywhere but above the shoulders. His general lack of resolve was one of many things that drove pitching coach Bryan Price to Arizona. Price’s successor, Rafael Chaves, and Meche have made one small adjustment – dropping his hands before delivery – and one big one.

“Our approach is that I’m going to stick with one thing from the beginning of camp until the end of the year,” said Meche, a notorious tinkerer. “That way, I can never say I didn’t get comfortable with one delivery. Chavvy felt like I was focusing too much on mechanics and not enough on where I was going to throw the ball.

“This is something I actually tried in the second half of 2004 and everything seemed to work for me. Why I got away from it last spring training, I have no idea.”

As for Pineiro, the demotion last season stung him badly – and if at first he just acted out, he has eventually settled into getting his act together, something that continued this spring.

“It was a lot of what we saw at the end of last year,” said manager Mike Hargrove. “He was more firm with his pitches, he had a better command of his pitches, he was more aggressive from the mound and he worked at a little faster pace. Just a lot of things that he did late that he didn’t do early (in the season).”

Yet this is still very much the show-us stage. If they flop again, likely the Mariners will, too.

“But I want it for myself,” Pineiro said. “I know if I have it for myself, it’s going to help the team out – it’s going to help every other starter. I want a big year for me and being healthy is the No. 1 thing.

“Hopefully, I go out there and do my job every five days and at least keep the chance for the team to win.”

John Blanchette is a columnist for The Spokesman-Review