He’s undecided after six years? Time to move on

Dear Annie: I am 40 and never married (I still reside at home). I have been in a long-distance relationship with “Emil” for six years. During this time, there have been many ups and downs, and the down times were miserable. Though there has been no formal commitment (engagement or relocation), we have remained together and see each other a few days every month.

Lately, I’m beginning to believe Emil may not be the person I am supposed to live my life with. I recently met someone at a party whose company I enjoyed very much. It made me wonder if the attraction was simply the newness of feeling desirable or if it was an indication that I am not as committed to Emil as I thought.

I know my family will not be pleased if I break up with Emil. They think he’s great. I want to do the right thing and not hurt anyone. I would like to get to know this new person better. Maybe it will go further, maybe not, but I don’t want to sneak around. At the same time, I realize I cannot have my cake and eat it, too. Can you give me some advice? – Desperate in the City

Dear Desperate: You’ve given Emil six years to make you feel that your relationship has a solid future, but it hasn’t happened. You are a grown woman, and your decisions should be your own. Don’t let your parents’ opinions dictate your happiness. If you are attracted to someone else, it’s time to tell Emil that you think the two of you should date others.

Dear Annie: This is in response to the writer from Canada who couldn’t find the “pound” key on her telephone. Give me a break. I don’t think valuable newspaper space should be devoted to such idiots. – Disappointed in Michigan

Dear Michigan: You’d be surprised how many people, especially the elderly, do not know where the pound key is. We felt the space was well used if we helped pass along information readers were too embarrassed to ask anyone else. And surprisingly, a lot of readers are more interested in this than we thought. Read on:

Dear Annie: In the part of the country where I grew up, absolutely no one called this a pound sign. It was the number-mark, or number-symbol. – HSV

Dear Annie: In some countries, such as Japan, that key is called a “sharp,” which is a musical term. – E.V.

Dear Annie: I read with interest your explanation of the pound sign and its location on the phone. The technical name of this symbol is “octothorpe.” – Don

Dear Don: Yes, but according to one story, that term was made up. Apparently, when the pound sign was put on telephone sets in the early ‘60s, one of the Bell Labs engineers, Don MacPherson, decided to call it the octothorpe. Why? Because it had eight points (octo), and because he was an admirer of the athlete Jim Thorpe.

For those who are still reading, outside of the U.S., this symbol is also called a hash, gate, tic-tac-toe and cross-hatch. We’re finished now.

Dear Annie: “Addicted in South Carolina” said he’s switched from alcoholic beverages to cough medicine. Most cough medicine contains alcohol – and in some cases has an alcohol content as high as table wine. “Addicted” merely has switched from one type of alcohol to another, and is fooling himself if he thinks he has remained sober for five years.

He needs to stop the cough medicine consumption immediately and go back to AA. His behavior is just another form of the denial that most of us alcoholics are so good at. Alcohol is alcohol, no matter what type of bottle it comes in. – Sober in Virginia

Dear Sober: You are so right. Thanks for the “expert” testimony.