Cartoonist Adams finally gives Dilbert a home of his own

It turns out Dilbert doesn’t live in a cubicle.

Cartoonist Scott Adams’ bespectacled engineer is something of an icon for workers everywhere. And after years of skewering life at the office, Adams is taking on the somewhat mindless, cookie-cutter nature of our homes.

He recently unveiled Dilbert’s Ultimate House (DUH), a virtual home mythically located in Northern California but in reality only at www.dilbert.com. And Dilbert’s is certainly a home like no other, a rather fanciful blend of good-natured humor and practical concerns.

“This whole thing came out of the frustration I’ve felt because every house I’ve lived in and every house I’ve looked at to live in seem to be conspicuously missing a lot of the things you’d want in a house,” explains Adams.

And just how would Adams and 3,000 or so of his fans – this project was “open source,” with Adams soliciting input online – improve on modern home design? First, lose the museum rooms. No living room. No dining room. No grand foyer. Then, on to the really important stuff, like cat litter.

“There’s something like 90 million cats in the United States,” says cat owner Adams, and nobody knows what to do with the litter box. So, Dilbert’s virtual home includes a cat litter-box room.

The house also features a storage closet designed specifically for an artificial Christmas tree, a basement basketball court, a killer home theater, a craft room with a station for wrapping presents and a spacious home office.

“The bedroom ought to be small because when you’re in there, you’re asleep. Dilbert’s bedroom is small, and his office is big,” Adams says.

Adams worked with Heartwood Studios to create the virtual home. The “tour” offers exterior and interior shots. The house, 3,383 square feet on the first level with a 2,151-square-foot basement, is supposed to be wife-bait for Dilbert, and even rather optimistically includes rooms for some future children.

The basic footprint is described as a squashed doughnut, with an interior patio, but there’s also a Dilbertian tower. Take a closer look, and you’ll see that the tower’s crenelations resemble Dilbert’s hairline and the two windows replicate his glasses. As for the home design itself, well, parents might find something a little familiar about DUH. It looks a bit like the Teletubbies’ dwelling.

Adams is into the practicalities of living, rather than appearances. The house is sparsely furnished.

“It’s all about looking good,” he says rather scornfully of homes today.

While Dilbert’s home is meant to be fun – there’s a rib-tickling list of some of the more unusual suggestions available on the Web site – it’s also an opportunity for Adams to share some of his environmental sensibilities. Adams consulted with Pacific Gas & Electric in designing an energy-efficient, virtually maintenance-free house, dealing with issues such as the home’s orientation, insulation and building materials.

So, we know where Dilbert lives. But what about Adams, who has so many ideas about what a house should be?

He lives in a Northern California apartment.

“I’m actually terribly tempted to build it,” he says of Dilbert’s house. “But I’ve got too many things going on.”