Ditka for Senate? Please, no
The recent Mike Ditka for Senate talk convinced Frank Fitzpatrick of the Philadelphia Inquirer that there need to be limits on athletes vying for office:
“I know that athletes are moving into politics in ever-increasing numbers. But when Mike Ditka is a viable candidate for a U.S. Senate seat, it’s probably time for a constitutional amendment.
So before Iron Mike changes his mind and goes to Washington, gets elected president, and names Buddy Ryan as secretary of defense, it might be wise to establish some limits as to who in the world of sports can run for office.
Among those athletes I’d ban are:
“Anyone over 21 who still plays video games. I know constant travel is tedious. But would it kill you to read a book?;
“Those who have children in more than three zip codes. Shawn Kemp was not a Founding Father;
“NASCAR drivers;
“Those who would open their Washington office for an episode of “Cribs. “Yo, right here in the Rayburn Building is where it all goes down. Know what I’m sayin?”;
“Players who have never passed a test except those designed to detect THG;
“Anyone who ever was outcoached by Rich Kotite, outhustled by Travis Lee or outpitched by Chad Ogea;
Banjo music is extra
Fitzpatrick also noted this development:
“A hotel near Daytona International Speedway, where rooms generally go for $89 a night, charged $300 a night and required a three-night minimum just before the recent Pepsi 400. This is pricing typical NASCAR fans out of the market. A family of 13 simply can’t afford those rates, even if they leave the mule home.”
Like pigs in slop
From the Caught on the Fly column in The Sporting News:
“Whispers from the D.C. area say that in an effort to transition the Redskins from the finesse, fun ‘n’ gun passing style of Steve Spurrier to the mauling, hog-loving, pile-pushing ways of Joe Gibbs, all restrictor plates will be removed from the team’s dining hall during training camp.”
Show me … the money
On his way to the ring for his World Boxing Organization 130-pound championship fight on Thursday night, Mike Anchondo had a moment of honesty, and much-needed levity, telling HBO Latino in Spanish, “I want to win this title for my people … and for the money.”