The Slice: Beware of dreaded Nine Mile disease

FIFTEEN-YEAR-OLD KATIE SMITH was attending a family reunion at Lake Roosevelt when she expressed concern about catching “that Nine Mile disease” from mosquitoes. That must be the Northwest version of West Nile virus.

But really, you can’t blame Katie for being worried. Some of the known symptoms of Nine Mile disease are the urge to own vehicles that get poor gas mileage, obsession with growing perfect tomatoes, ice cream addiction and an inability to sink three-foot putts.

“And then you’re forced to do housework: According to Trevor Beamer, 5, the expression is “Finders keepers, losers sweepers.”

“Post-vacation tip: If you roll the windows down every night in the garage, that telltale fast-food smell permeating your car’s interior should ease up by Christmas.

“Class reunion previews: Here are some of the songs you’re apt to hear this summer.

Class of 1944: “Don’t Fence Me In,” “Straighten Up and Fly Right,” “Mairzy Doats.”

Class of 1954: “Hey There,” “Sh-Boom,” “Mr. Sandman.”

Class of 1964: “She Loves You,” “Where Did Our Love Go,” “Oh, Pretty Woman.”

Class of 1974: “It’s Only Rock ‘n Roll (But I Like It),” “Can’t Get Enough of Your Love, Babe,” “Haven’t Got Time for the Pain.”

Class of 1984: “Here Comes the Rain Again,” “Once in a Lifetime,” “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun.”

Class of 1994: “All I Wanna Do,” “Mr. Jones,” “Until I Fall Away.”

“Asked and answered: “Yes, garage doors CAN be possessed,” wrote LeAnne Hunter. “We still laugh semi-hysterically about the day when our own went berserk.”

Here’s what happened.

“We arrived home, hit the remote, and the garage door went up. And down. And up. And down again. Up and down, up and down, we couldn’t get it to quit.”

The couple tried to open the remote to remove the battery. But they couldn’t pry it apart.

“My husband had to take the remote to his shop and smash it with his hammer — over and over, like in a bad horror movie,” wrote Hunter. “Evil, evil remote.”

She now wonders what would happen if the TV remote went haywire.

Karen Mobley wonders: “Why is it that when your house is for sale, people stop by to look but only when you are in the shower?”

“The Slice recommends: Randomly muttering, “We’re gonna need a bigger boat.”

“Warm-up question: Which bugs you more — someone talking to you while you’re obviously concentrating on something or someone initiating a conversation from another room even though you can’t really understand what that person is saying?

“Today’s Slice question: Does putting “Make sure the stove is turned off” on a pre-vacation checklist decrease the likelihood that you will actually remember to turn off the stove?