First Lyle, Then James: There’s Hope For Us All

James Carville is not - how shall we put this delicately - the most handsome of men.

In fact, the Cajun-accented Louisiana pol looks like a squinty-eyed billiard ball with ears. Still, by dint of personality, intelligence and some undefined other character trait, he was able to court and capture the very intelligent and semi-beautiful Mary Matalin.

On a recent television taping in Washington, host Tim Russert guessed how this might have happened. He referred to a Washington Post article by Susan Carpenter-Hale that speculated Carville “must be great in bed.”

“His face turned beet red,” Russert said. “He looked at me speechless. There was a pause. He put his head down.” Finally, Carville admitted that he was “the luckiest guy in the world.” And then he thanked Carpenter-Hale.

Loose talk

Steven Spielberg on his mother: “There’s no way for me to be closer to her except to live inside her. Which I’ve already done.”

There’ll be no party; he’s havin’ woman troubles

Robert Cray turns 44 today.

‘Uptown Girl’ takes starring role in her own daily melodrama

Former supermodel Christie Brinkley is the subject of a restraining order. According to the lawsuit, Brinkley and her husband, Peter Cook, want to run caretaker Danielle Wagenhauser off their Long Island, N.Y., estate. Wagenhauser claims Brinkley told her, “I’m going to get you. I want the apartment myself and I’ll do whatever it takes.”

Then O.J. and Johnnie Cochran made it a foursome

O.J Simpson trial celebrity Mark Fuhrman, the former Los Angeles policeman now living in Sandpoint, spent a weekend in Connecticut with Vanity Fair writer Dominick Dunne a few weeks ago. “I invited him over,” Dunne told the New York Post. “Those of us at that trial - I was there for over a year - got to be friends.”

Imagine Madonna warbling, ‘Buckle up for safety, buckle up’

Next time you’re in New York, don’t be surprised if a celebrity orders you around. Big Apple taxis are using the recorded voices of famous people to remind riders to buckle up their seat belts. Among those you can expect to hear: Placido Domingo, Eartha Kitt, Jackie Mason, Joan Rivers, Joe Torre, Dr. Ruth Westheimer and Judd Hirsch.

‘The business of America is business’: Calvin Coolidge

Another sign of the coming apocalypse: “Selena’s spirit,” goes the opening line of an Associated Press story, “will live on in a women’s clothing line bearing her name.”

Guess who’s no longer California dreamin’?

Belinda Carlisle, like Thomas Wolfe, knows the problems involved in trying to go home. “To tell you the truth, I can’t wait to get out of here,” the pop singer told the Long Beach Press-Telegram. “I don’t like it here anymore.” Carlisle was in California doing publicity for her new album.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 Photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster