The Slice That Nice Young Man Is After Sex

So we were headed into a downtown restaurant at lunchtime when we dropped a newspaper.

A sharp-looking young man in a suit and tie was coming out of the place at just that moment. He bent over and picked it up. “Here you are, sir,” he said with a smile.

It was amazing.

Now it’s not as if we’re always flabbergasted by simple acts of courtesy. They happen. But this guy caught us off guard. Picking up that paper was almost aggressively considerate.

We thanked him. Then we noticed that he was with a woman. She was what some might call a bombshell.

Suddenly everything became clear. That guy didn’t care about helping us retrieve that newspaper. He just wanted to impress his companion.

He wanted her to think, “My, he’s thoughtful - maybe he’s not like all those other jerks.”

Or at least that’s what we imagined.

But you know something? Even if he was faking his courtesy routine - and, of course, there’s no proof of that - we’ve got to say that we have observed worse courting techniques.

Just think about some of the things men have been known to do in the hope of impressing women. It’s a scary list, isn’t it?

So maybe it’s not the end of the world if a few guys decide that, instead of trying to come off as cool or tough, they’ll project an air of cheerful civility. And as long as it’s not taken to Eddie Haskell extremes, what’s the harm?

Good luck, pal.

Slice answers: Readers’ nicknames for telemarketing calls include “Dinner conversation” and “Buzz.”

Thinking of the right thing to say too late: We were walking in the west end of downtown when a man wearing sunglasses approached us. He was casually dressed. But he had a vaguely well-to-do look about him. He seemed like a guy whose idea of fun would be to captain an expensive sailing vessel in some regatta with an insufferably pretentious name.

“Can you tell me how to find the Chamber of Commerce?” he asked.

We provided him with directions. Then he went on his way.

If we had it to do over again, we would have added something.

Something along the lines of “If you intend to pay decent wages, invest in the community and not damage our environment, feel free to relocate your business to this area. Otherwise, Oregon is thataway.”

Today’s Slice question: Considering Spokane’s family-oriented reputation, doesn’t it strike you that a lot of people in business here are anything but kid-friendly?

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Drawing

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