The Slice Oh, To Be Young Again And Have All The Good Answers

Let’s check in on Ginny Ressel’s kindergarten class at Sprague Elementary in Lincoln County.

During a discussion of what to do if you get lost, young Benjamin Brown was asked how he would cope if he got separated from his family in a big store. No problem, he said. He’d whip out a map and a compass.

And in a lesson about being wary of strangers, John Courneya told what he would say if some man pulled up in a car and asked his name. “I’m very sorry, sir, I don’t have a name.”

Thanks, Ginny. Good luck with snowsuit season.

Stealing stinks: Friends of ours who run a downtown restaurant had a problem. Some person or persons kept swiping their copy of the Swell Paper before they could bring it in. So one day, they loaded up an old edition of the newspaper with onion and garlic. Then they planted it outside. Sure enough, it got snatched.

Ah, revenge is pungent.

First, we kill all the reporters: While there was another event going on at City Hall one night last week, some kids found their way into the room where the City Council holds its public meetings. One little boy switched on a microphone and could be heard doing a dead-on impression of an elected official…”Will somebody get the press out of here.”

Name density: Mead’s J. Domanico has a niece and three sisters-in-law all named Sue.

Hanging 10: 1. Around here, speaking Canadian as a second language ought to earn you a raise. 2. We can’t imagine being a teacher and having to listen to people who don’t have a clue spout off about what’s wrong with schools. 3. If only the Rolling Stones had sung about a “gin-soaked barroom queen in Spokane.” 4. We’re awed by people able to relax and have fun on business trips. 5. We suspect surgeons secretly compete for the title “Best HandWasher.” 6. We’ve wondered what might qualify as the most unusual donation ever placed in a local church offertory basket. 7. When it comes to private nicknames for coworkers, a Don’t ask/Don’t tell policy is best. 8. When phoning Our Generation, don’t call it the “Teen Beat” section. 9. Julie Schwab overheard someone ask a bartender what kind of alcohol goes in a hot-buttered-rum. 10. Megan Beck’s cat goes to a neighbor’s to watch TV.

Today’s Slice question: What percentage of the time is your home tidy enough for company?

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Drawing

MEMO: The Slice appears Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday. Write The Slice at P.O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; fax (509) 459-5098. After he’d downed a fair amount of the stuff, we heard a friend wonder aloud if his “blood hummus” level exceeded legal limits.