If You Have Regrets, You Need Only To Try Harder

If you get very far in life and find you have no regrets, you’re either very lucky or on very good medication.

Cosmopolitan magazine recently polled a bunch of Hollywood types and came up with their regrets, which include:

Rebecca De Mornay - “I regret that I have not gone skydiving.”

Richard Dreyfuss - “I’m sorry I didn’t pursue sports as a kid.”

Lloyd Bridges - “I was a virgin when I was married and I don’t know whether that was wise or not - to know so little about women.”

And then there’s Don Johnson, whose only regret seems to be that he doesn’t have a bigger imagination - “I have done everything I’ve ever taken a fancy to. The only things I haven’t done are things I haven’t thought of.”

Loose Talk

Richard Dreyfuss to members of the media covering the O.J. Simpson trial (from the Associated Press): “The end result of the constant coverage is that the people in the country have been whipped into a frenzy. And if I had anything to do with it, I’d take you guys right out of here.”

He’ll celebrate that and his glorious Celtic heritage

Arnold “Red” Auerbach turns 78 today.

Keaton to Hollywood: Will direct for food

“Unstrung Heroes,” which opens Friday in Spokane, is the latest effort by actress Diane Keaton to become a film director. “I begged my agent to find me work, any work,” Keaton Newsday. She even did, she admits, “an after-school special, the lowest form of television.”

At least Julie didn’t drive over a cliff

When she wrote “Thelma and Louise,” screenwriter Callie Khouri was a feminist’s heroine. Things are different now that she’s written “Something to Talk About,” which involves a woman standing by her cheating husband. “It’s not my job to write for people who go to the movies looking for fulfillment they should be looking for someplace else,” Khouri told Elle mag. “I’d rather be a role model than write one.”

He’s a charter member of the Hair Club for Men

If you want to see first-of-a-kind photos of Burt Reynolds bald, race to the supermarket and pick up a copy of the National Enquirer. It’s said to be the audition photo that won him a role in the forthcoming Demi Moore film “Striptease.”

Whatever happened to Liz’s hub, ol’ what’s-his-name?

Larry Fortensky, Elizabeth Taylor’s estranged husband, is back driving a truck on a construction site for $20 an hour. “It’s quite an adjustment for him to go back to his regular life without Liz,” says his sister Linda Mitchell. “But he hates Hollywood stuff. He’s never forgotten who he is or where he came from.”

He/she had doubts about the swimsuit competition, too

Even as the 1995 Miss America crown was being handed to Shawntell Smith on Saturday, a 6-foot-4 drag queen named Kiki was being awarded the fourth annual Miss’d America crown in an Atlantic City gay bar just six blocks away.

, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: 2 color photos

The following fields overflowed: CREDIT = Compiled by staff writer Dan Webster