Parent, Teen Learn Joys Of Volunteering Together
Parental choices: When do they start?
I think it was when the doctor said, “You’re not just tired; you’re pregnant.”
Maybe it was when I first held Fianna in my arms and she cried, “Feed me!”
Every moment from then on pushed me further into parental choices: the first cupcake she smashed all over the highchair, those attention-getting tugs on my pants.
When the teen years arrive and dating begins, boyfriends start knocking at the front door and the phone rings off the hook. Quiet afternoons are interrupted by teenage problems, and parental choices become difficult.
Is my daughter being shaped by all those choices I have made and will continue to make? Will she be able to pass those values on when she’s a parent herself?
Some hard choices come down all too quickly - questions such as “What role do I play in my daughter’s daily life?”
I no longer give direction on how to talk, walk or eat. Now, I must make choices that affect being a friend or mentor.
Fianna recently surprised me by writing an article for her high school newspaper, the Ferris Saxon Globe, about volunteering. In it, she shared her feelings about the work we do together for the Adams Elementary School Sky Dancer drill team.
As a parent aide at Adams, I started the drill team six years ago for children who weren’t participating in other school activities. About four years ago, Fianna, who had been a Sky Dancer when she attended Adams, told me she wanted to stay involved even though she was moving on to middle school.
We’ve worked together ever since.
She choreographs and jointly plans teaching the dance lessons. She orchestrates teddy-bear picnics and performances for ice cream socials and the Junior Lilac Parade by giving direction to fourth-, fifth- and sixth-grade girls and boys.
In her article, Fianna spoke of patience when teaching children and of the rewards, benefits and satisfaction.
The article’s most important part was the title, “Making a Difference.”
Needless to say, I am deeply touched. Fianna makes a difference in me every day. She has made every parental choice a task worth completing.
MEMO: “Your Turn” is a feature of the Wednesday and Saturday Opinion pages. To submit a column for consideration, call Rebecca Nappi/459-5496 or Doug Floyd/459-5466.