It can happen when a family member is in a hospital or nursing home for an extended period.

You sort of get to know the staff. And they sort of get to know you.

There is this entirely new set of people who are, given the circumstances, suddenly quite important to you.

Often these associations are fairly intense. There's stress involved, after all. But sometimes these new faces can become something like friends. You count on them. And they get used to seeing you.

You can learn a few things about a nurse's children. You talk with another staffer about his plans to go back to school. Day after day.

Then your family member is discharged or dies. And you say your distracted good-byes.

For the staff at the hospital or nursing home, this is just the way it is. Patients come, patients go. Families come, families go.

You just hope you remembered to say thank-you.

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