AM Hucks: Hot, Hunky, Able to Fillet Squirrel
At Huckleberries Online on Wednesday, Rainbow Sparkle Pony Angel and Whippersnapper (shown in parentheses) debated what North Idaho wimmen want in their men. RSPA: Owns two (2) 1986 Subaru Brats and one runs! (W: WRONG! The Nickels Worth ad clearly says "... neither runs, but could make one good one from the two cars ..." RSPA: Has jumper-cabled power AND cable TV to his singlewide. (W: WRONG! A woman oughta be fine with rabbit ears, else she's a golddigger.) RSPA: Can cook up a batch of meth while making Top Ramen for her 7 kids for dinner. (W: WRONG! Ramen takes three minutes; meth takes at least a day and half.) RSPA: Sexy SS, swastika and Peckerwood gang tattoos on his forehead. (W: WRONG! SS tattoos go on the neck, gang on the back and only the SWASTIKA on the forehead.) RSPA: Prison pecs! (W: WRONG! Women love biceps and needle tracks just as much as pecs.) RSPA: Likes slow moonlit drives in the rain while humming romantic country music songs and jack-lighting deer. (W: CLARIFICATION: A real woman can handle the spotlight while riding redneck in your 1974 Ford F250.) RSPA: Knows which beer to serve with squirrel. (W: WRONG: Squirrel only goes with malt liquor.) RSPA: Never forgets his wife's birthday because she's his twin! (W: WRONG! For the record, twins marryin' ain't common. Cousins are OK, if they're over 12.) Any questions?