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The Spokesman-Review Newspaper
Spokane, Washington  Est. May 19, 1883

Huckleberries Online

Best of Huckleberries — Continued

On Sanders PUBLIC Beach
Dunno which was more pathetic after that court ruling returning Sanders Beach on Lake Coeur d’Alene to the public: 1. The thick white line some East Lakeshore Drive Fat Cat chalked about 15 feet from the shore delineating which part of the beach was still his; 2. The obnoxious fence Jack Simpson erected in defiance of the town’s shoreline ordinance that still blocks the public beach; or 3. The two sets of beachcombers who were allowing their dogs to run free on Sanders Beach in defiance of signs at the two entrances that say dogs must be leashed. No one wants to behave himself.

Married Minds Think Alike
Mari Meehan/Dogtrack Musings explains how you can tell you’re on the same track with your significant other after 35 years and 361 days of marriage. On Thursday, the Meehans were returning from Spokane when they passed one of those mini-Hummers. Sez Mari: “Has the standard equipment.” Then, in unison, the Meehans exclaimed: “A woman on a cell phone!” Bingo … In the “Unclear on the Concept Department,” one of the signs held by Spokane Mayor Jim West supporters protesting signature gathering on Division Avenue for the recall effort said: “Giglie (sic) Was A Lousy Movie.” With signs like that who needs supporters? … If you’re a “Seinfeld” fan, you’ll know why Huckleberries chuckleberried when Cis Gors/Kootenai introduced a new version to a famous old line by Elaine: “Are you gas worthy?” You see, Elaine was dealing with matters of the heart and a shortage of … ah, never mind.

Rumorama
Huckleberries hears … that local syndicated talkmistress Laurie Roth is continuing to make progress from here horrific motorcycle collision with a deer. Sez a good source: “She’s now able to move from her bed to a wheelchair, Physical, occupational and speech therapists are working daily with Laurie. Laurie’s improved condition has allowed her to be moved out of the ICU ward to the neurology floor at Sacred Heart Hospital.”

Did Someone Say: Snow?
Joanne Stibitz has one of the best new North Idaho blogs: “Your Choice.” Each day, she poses a tough either-or or multiple-choice question. For example, if you were down to your last coupla bucks, which would you choose: a Wendy’s burger or two tacos? On Thursday, she posted one of the toughest choices yet, asking (and Huckleberries paraphrases): You’ve been warned five days in advance by the media about a Category 5 Winter, a calamity that produces snow 3 stories high. You have no family or much money. What are you going to do? Choices: 1. Stay – Stay, it never snows that much in Idaho; 2. Walk – You have five days to get out with your backpack and save your family; 3. Call Dr. Phil – You can’t handle the stress; 4. Wait until you see 2 stories of snow. 5. Wait for the government. Anyone? (You can answer by going to Joanne’s site: http://www.stebbijo.blogspot.com.)

Huckleberries
Poet’s Corner: “It’s as big as their house/and they’ve noticed, alas,/it goes roughly as far/on a gallon of gas – The Bard of Sherman Avenue (“New RV”) … Dunno if the suds, barbecue and free music worked their magic at the recent 13th Annual Outdoor Music Festival at Schweitzer or those guys and gals warned by Bonner County Deputy Dawg Flynn simply enjoy flashing strangers … Bumpersnicker (sighted at Coeur d’Alene Inn Wednesday): "People are more likely to oppose fur than leather because its easier to harass a rich woman than a motorcycle gang" … Sign of the Times: Only 49.3% of students responding to a WSU Daily Evergreen poll last week feel “very safe” while walking around campus at night … Blogger CDADave gave a series of examples last week on how to tell you’re getting older, including: “When I see a bikini-clad sweet young thing at the beach, rather than being lecherous, I feel like an uncle or a big brother.”

Parting Shot
Upon spying bazillionaire Duane Hagadone’s trademark geraniums at the site of his proposed $100M-plus condo project, the aforementioned CDADave commented on his blog (http://www.cdadave.blogspot.com): “This must be how Mr. H marks his territory." Beats Mother Nature’s alternatives.



Huckleberries Online

D.F. Oliveria started Huckleberries Online on Feb. 16, 2004. Oliveria's Sunday print Huckleberries is a past winner of the national Herb Caen Memorial Column contest.