The Slice: You know what they say about the weather

I have long suggested in print that talking about the weather is insipid.

At least when it comes to characterizing the current conditions, assuming they are unexceptional.

But here’s the thing. Everyone does it. And you know what? I do, too.

For all my complaining that it is no improvement on silence, I can spit out this brand of small talk with the best of them.

So what if it’s not trenchant commentary? It is harmless and congenial.

My real beef has been with local TV news anchors embracing the assumption that we all prefer the same kind of weather. Hearing certain of them express their desire to have it be 99 degrees, coupled with an unseemly timidity about winter, grated on me.

But I have lightened up on that score as well. It’s easy to ignore if the mute button is out of reach. Besides, just what are they supposed to talk about as they are signing off?

Maybe I’m just jealous. So if you can’t beat ’em …

Today The Slice inaugurates a special reader service – WeatherGab. If you want to hear what I think about the current conditions, just call. Or send me an email. I’ll write back.

Won’t that be exciting?

“It seemed OK out when I rode my bike to work,” I might say.

Or, “Wouldn’t hurt to take your jacket.”

Sky’s the limit.

Slice answer: “My husband, Ron, and I have been married for almost 29 years,” wrote Marian Ortiz. “We were out and about one day and stopped at a gas station to fill up the car. I was in the passenger seat. Ron went around to the gas pump, which was on the passenger side of the car. While the gas was pumping, he opened up the passenger door, leaned in to give me a kiss, then closed the door and finished up with the gas. That definitely made me feel loved – and lucky.”

Today’s adventure in hearing loss: “When I was 10 years old I answered the telephone and didn’t hear a response,” wrote Arlie Robinson. “A few minutes later it happened again – no one was answering. The third time the telephone rang my mother answered.”

It was Arlie’s aunt calling. “Why does she keep hanging up on me?” the aunt demanded of Arlie’s mother.

It turned out Arlie had just lost hearing in one ear while sick with the mumps.

Today’s Slice question: What local kid holds the record for eye-rolling?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email pault@spokesman.com. What American city could be Spokane’s evil twin?