Annie’s Mailbox: Hubby, not son’s girlfriend is to blame

Dear Annie: Two months ago, I discovered that my husband had been texting and calling my oldest son’s girlfriend. My son told me about it after his girlfriend asked him, “What’s wrong with your father?” She said it began last June, but claimed it was only one phone call and a few texts. It made me feel ugly and unwanted.

I suspect she is leaving out the extent of her involvement in encouraging him. This has crushed what was left of my feelings for him. He already had committed “financial infidelity” to the point where I was paying most of the bills with my small disability income. He always had some excuse for not providing any money to the household. I even had to apply for provisions from the local food pantry.

When this indiscretion happened, I finally had enough, and we are now separated. The problem is, it is very awkward for me to interact with my son’s girlfriend. Am I jumping the gun on getting a divorce? What should I do? – Crushed in Green Bay

Dear Crushed: Please stop blaming your son’s girlfriend for your husband’s inappropriate behavior. She probably had no idea how to react to his texts and calls without causing a family problem. You need to forgive her for attracting your husband. Then decide whether you are better off with or without him. If you cannot do this on your own, get some counseling.