This column reflects the opinion of the writer. Learn about the differences between a news story and an opinion column.
The Slice: How’d you do this summer?
People around here wait and wait for summer.
Finally, it arrives.
Then, zip, it’s almost over.
And we’re left to ask ourselves one key question: Was it a good one?
That’s always a personal call, of course.
But if you’re having a hard time evaluating the season, perhaps The Slice can help.
Maybe what you need is a scorecard. So get out a pencil and prepare to do the math.
This summer, you …
… laughed yourself out of breath 10 or more times. (+5)
… had to buy your swimsuit at Tarps ’n’ More. (-5)
… heard some new stories at the family reunion. (+5)
… burned the crust on three straight pies. (-5)
… got into the best shape of your life, without really trying. (+5)
… got dumped and, in all honesty, deserved it. (-5)
… spent days out on the water that you wished would never end. (+5)
… got swimmer’s itch and an ear infection. (-5)
… went fishing and said some things that needed to be said. (+5)
… got a sunburn that gave off a phosphorescent glow. (-5)
… made the neighborhood kids squeal over the excellence of your homemade ice cream. (+5)
… lost $73,000 running a lemonade stand. (-5)
… were told you swim like a dolphin. (+5)
… realized you aren’t the Wiffle ball pitcher you once were. (-5)
… oversaw 55 successful cookouts. (+5)
… unintentionally demonstrated the downside to fireworks. (-5)
… had a summer romance you’ll always associate with that one haunting song. (+5)
… finally concluded that your practically new tent will never stop smelling like skunk. (-5)
… sidearmed a stone and watched it skip over the lake more times than you could count. (+5)
… went 0 for 24 from the field during Hoopfest. (-5)
… had all sorts of people offer to buy your boat. (+5)
… got a new boss who doesn’t trust you because you have no interest in golf. (-5)
… realized at your high school reunion that you had been right all along. (+5)
… watched every episode of “Swingtown,” and felt old. (-5)
… made a defensive play in a softball game that people are still talking about. (+5)
… bit into a S’more that must have been approximately 300 degrees. (-5)
… grew several clusters of stunningly perfect tomatoes. (+5)
… got stung by an insect and fumbled your wallet into a deep part of the lake. (-5)
Rate Your Summer
70 points: Yes, you had a great season.
-70 points: Better luck next year.
Everything in between: Win some, lose some.
•Today’s Slice question: At what age are friendships hardest to maintain?