Camilla and Charles: A Cinderella story for older stepsisters
Camilla Parker-Bowles has been called many names: old bag, horse-face, nag.
Princess Diana called her “the Rottweiler.”
But this week she rewrote the classic fairy tale with a welcome bit of reality. Prince Charming, having chosen the youngest and fairest of the land, didn’t wind up living happily ever after – not one bit. And now, after 35 years, he’s setting things straight. He’s asked for the hand of the older stepsister, the woman he should have married all along.
There’s a certain satisfaction in this development, especially for women of a certain age, those of us who grow weary of the notion of trophy wives, tired of the sight of collagen-enhanced Trump brides, and cranky at the thud of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue landing in the mailbox.
There’s a certain satisfaction when a woman triumphs in the end, not by succumbing to cultural pressures, but by remaining true to exactly who she is.
It couldn’t have been easy.
During the years Charles was married, the British press loathed her.
A writer for the London Times described Prince Charles’ predicament like this: “As far as the public and the press were concerned, preferring Parker-Bowles to his wife was like paying for jellied eels when the lobster thermidor was free.”
Even this week, even at Valentine’s Day, the media hasn’t been especially kind.
A snarky writer for Time magazine observed, “Now Charles gets to rule Britain with the frumpy consort of his dreams.”
But Time has it wrong.
Youth and beauty are the highest priority when one deals in the buying and selling and dissemination of images. When one deals in real life, in matters of the heart, they’re only one small part of the equation.
Perhaps we understood this better years ago.
This week Washington state senators voted to repeal a 1909 law making it illegal to slander a woman.
They voted with probably the best of intentions, saying the law was patronizing, unenforceable and archaic. But I rather hate to see it go.
Recently I wrote a column criticizing MTV. A young MTV fan left a mumbled voice message on my phone. He signed off with the words, “You old hag.”
It might have been fun to at least consider prosecuting.
It’s an odd development, this transition into midlife, not unlike adolescence, when people you don’t even know begin to project a peculiar disregard.
In adolescence, you notice strangers eyeing your breasts and your bottom, and sometimes making the most ghastly comments of appraisal. Grocery sackers begin leaping to eager-eyed attention as you wind through the checkout line.
In midlife, an odd reversal occurs. The bag boys couldn’t find you more boring – unless you’re accompanied by your teenage daughter. Strangers’ reactions can range from laughable indifference to downright nastiness, all because you’ve had the audacity to continue to celebrate one birthday after another.
Perhaps those who passed Washington’s law back in 1909 knew something about the human soul that we’ve forgotten. Perhaps they knew that buried deep in our culture lies a fear and fascination with the lives of women and all their mysterious powers.
Those powers were on full display last week as Prince Charles announced he’d marry Camilla Parker-Bowles on April 8. Something began 35 years ago for Charles and Camilla that has endured. Their love, based on whatever quirky, mysterious set of reasons that binds any couple, continues to flower like an heirloom rose.
Seems a highly unlikely development for a woman long viewed as one step away from baking small children into gingerbread.
Her friends describe her sturdy sense of humor, her warmth and charm, her utterly British spirit of “getting on with it.” She is, they say, “a brick.” And in England, that’s a compliment. Her face has a few lines, and her eyelids may droop a bit, but no one who knows her cares, least of all the jug-eared prince.
Now they’re marrying. Women of a certain age should prepare to toast the bride. It wasn’t in gaining the prince, but in shoring up her strength of self, that Camilla has won.
Long live the woman who almost shall become Queen.