Empathy, Caring Part Of The Package At Clothing Bank
Amid racks and shelves and shoe holders at the Valley Center’s clothing bank, volunteers Karen Lus and Ethel Ramsey hand out paper bags and smiles.
Into those grocery store bags, men and women who live on a too-tight budget pack pants, shirts, shoes or household items for themselves and their families.
Into their hearts go Ramsey’s and Lus’ kind words.
“Sometimes they’ll walk in and you can tell they’re nervous. But they feel wanted after being here,” says Ramsey, who’s 82 and has been volunteering there for four years.
“Hopefully we provide them with a place to come where they can find good, clean usable clothes that they aren’t charged for,” Lus says. “We’ve all been there. You’ve got to go through the bad times to know the good.”
From the moment a person walks through the clothing bank’s doors, Ramsey and Lus begin to chat with them and try to make them feel comfortable. “How ya doing? Come on in. Sign this form. Get yourself a bag and start filling it up,” Ramsey says, without taking a breath. Then the real conversation starts. About kids, grandkids, jobs or just how’s-it-going stuff.
“You get to know them on a first name basis,” says Lus. “I even see them in the grocery store and start conversations with them, asking about the kids or their families. We wonder if they’re all right when we don’t see them.” Once, Lus and Ramsey sent a Christmas card and a letter to a woman who hadn’t been at the bank in a while.
“When we got the card and letter back, we knew something had happened and we were worried,” Ramsey says. “But there was nothing else we could do. I ran into the woman at an estate sale and she was OK.”
Twenty hours a week, Monday through Wednesday, Lus, who’s been there for six years, and Ramsey wait on people and “straighten up the mess.” They sort through the bags of donations from Valley residents and organize the items into age groups and sizes. They’ve got everything for everyone, Ramsey says. “And we’re glad to help them find what they need.”
But not everyone is easy to help. “I get joy out of waiting on most people who come in,” Ramsey says, with a sly grin. “But there are a few who we send around the corner to the attitude test.” That test is a poem found on one of the walls in the clothing bank. It’s there, the women say, to remind everyone that life is what you make it.
One woman, Helene, comes in regularly to see Ramsey and Lus and to collect some clothes for her husband, her children and herself.
“The first time I came in I was kind of nervous,” says the young mother. Then Ramsey gently guided Helene through the process and they’ve been pals every since.
“Do you all have any hair dryers?” asked Helene.
“No, I don’t think we do right now,” says Ramsey. “But I’ve got one at home you can have. I’ll bring it in for you.”
When they’re not giving generously of themselves, Ramsey and Lus tend to their yards and homes. Lus also visits with her young grandchildren regularly. Ramsey says she’s either helping out at church or visiting with elderly people when not working. But some days, Ramsey can’t stay away.
“On days when I’m not here, I sometimes come in to see if everything’s OK or if we’ve gotten any new donations to sort through,” Ramsey says. “It’s a marvelous job to have because it makes you feel so good.”
One little boy made an impression on Ramsey that she says she won’t soon forget.
“He was looking at me and looking at me so I asked if there was anything I could do for him. He asked if he could hug me. I found out he’d lost his grandmother and I looked like her.”
Tapping her heart lightly, she says that’s what makes it all worthwhile.”People mean a lot to us,” says Ramsey. “It keeps our minds working hard.” And their hearts a lot more full.
, DataTimes ILLUSTRATION: Photo
MEMO: Saturday’s People is a regular Valley Voice feature profiling remarkable individuals in the Valley.